To Agent Alien33:
I am tasking you with an important mission to be completed within a week. It is a hunt for merriment. The mission starts on the 29th of June and will end on 5th of July. You have to solve one clue every day to get to the next day's clue.
Proceed with caution because the stakes are high - trust me, you want to enter your 33rd year of life successfully.
Here is your first clue:
That which you can eat for the rest of your life singularly.
Find it, take a picture of it and send to me as proof of your find. Then capture it (with cash if you must) and consume half of it.
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